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Sailing the Lee

Sailing the Lee
 
I have sailed
Along the lee shore
Sometimes jailed
A situation not to ignore
 
I cannot escape
The wind pushing me hard
Unable to make my sail shape
Act quick or my boat scarred
 
Wrecked upon the rocks
Wrecked upon the reef
Wrecked upon the shoal
Wrecked upon the beach
 
Why keep the boat
Why not swim away
Why not jump and float
Why not go your way
 
I hate to leave my vessel
A good looking ship
Easy to sail and wrestle
Wrestle and ride on a trip
 
Or wasting my life
Hoping to reach or tack
To a safe point with no strife
With wind to my back
 
But where is the fun
Where is the excitement
A blast compared to none
Enticement and incitement
 
Close hauled along the edge
Water breaking over the bow
I have not hedged or pledged
To give up and quit now
 
Flying through the water
The boat lifted high
There is a breakwater
Safety is nearby
 
But why oh why
Do I reduce sail
Or tack and glide by
Using the gale
 
I will miss the challenge
I will miss my love
I will miss the satisfaction
I will miss the gratification
 
There is nothing like her
There is nothing to compare
There are emotions to stir
There are moments to share
 
I plan to sail on
Catching the wind
Until the emotion is gone
Or just left behind
 
Behind in the docks
Or on its trailer
Or sitting on blocks
Missing its sailor
 

Family

Family
 
Do you enjoy
Your family
Or is it a ploy
Or an anomaly
 
A ploy to get money
A ploy to get affection
A ploy to be funny
A ploy for connection
 
A connection to what
A connection to who
A connection in my gut
A connection made of glue
 
Join us together
Fasten us to each other
A common tether
Mother or brother
 
Is this common
Is this normal
Is this unusual
Is this irregular
 
No it is not
For many to live
Relatives not forgot
Families to thrive
 
What is the common thread
Families to proceed
Is it the homestead
Or blood of a family creed
 
A creed to love
A creed to support
A creed to encourage
A creed to equally share
 
Generation to generation
Forgive one another
Give for the duration
Smother and smother
 
Smother with love
Smother with kindness
Smother with resources
Smother with mercy
 
Mercy is the hardest
When we feel wronged
But we can harness
By remembering we belonged
 
Belonged to a family line
Belonged to a congregation
Belonged to the vine
Belonged to a narration
 
A narration to work together
A narration to read
A narration to learn
A narration to believe
 
Believe in God
Believe in kin
Believe all are flawed
Believe we all sin
 
Sin is there
Every single day
Repent with prayer
Believe and pray
 
God is first
Family second
Our nation third
And there is no fourth
 
Align on one
Read the one
Learn the one
Worship the one
 
Forgive those in two
Love those in two
Show mercy to those in two
Share with those in two
 
Honor those in three
Respect those in three
Support those in three
Affirm those in three
 
Teach yours these
Time and time again
These are the keys
Our family will remain

Happy Birthday Again



Birthday Again
 
I have another birthday
One more year
Let us downplay
And save the cheer
 
I have had many good ones
I plan to have many more
I have eaten cake in tons
I have blown out candles galore
 
What is one more celebration
We all celebrate them
Like the stars in the constellation
Routine and another ho hum
 
But what if I say
I am kidding
I want the display
I am admitting
 
Display the cake
Display the cards
Display the presents
Display the smiles
 
Five or Fifty
I want the recognition
Really cool and nifty
Bring on the magician and musician
 
I am happy everyone remembered
This special ceremonial occasion
Another numbered and rendered
Extending my life equation
 
I am delighted my loves are here
Kissing and hugging me
And I want to hear
Happy Birthday sung with glee

The Drug

The Drug
 
Amitriptyline
Is my drug
Not really crystalline
I think like a slug
 
So very very dragging
So very very hampered
So very very lagging
So very very hammered
 
I can not think
I can not write
I can not read
I can not understand
 
I can walk
I can talk
I can exercise
I can drive
 
A trade off
Lose the crazy woes
Do not unbelieve or scoff
Or live in the shadows
 
Easier to be alone
Easier to hideaway
Easier to be my own
Easier to live that way
 
Live in solitary
Or to fight the darkness
I am my adversary
What a starkness
 
To live in society
Amitriptyline is required
To end anxiety
A new life is desired
 
Slow with limited derailments
Sleep too much
Drugged but no aliments
Amitriptyline is a crutch
 
Last time 10 mg
Then 20 and 30 mg
Then 40 to 70 mg
All the way to 80 mg
 
In the end
It began shirking
No more dividends
And it quit working
 
Better for awhile
To have some assistance
A pleasant smile
And a healthy existence

Adore

Adore
 
What is adore
How do we get there
Not a story of lore
But let me share
 
Starts as a nightingale
A crush on a caregiver
A common tale
To someone who can deliver
 
Smart Girl worked hard
To analyze me
Another patient on her dance card
She is my significant key
 
She found I walk funny
She sent me to a specialist
She was so sunny
She was excellent
 
I found her smart
I found her pretty
I found her a piece of art
I found her witty
 
Yes they fixed my pain
My leg quit hurting
Adverting the ball and chain
Now my interest was flirting
 
I asked her out
Once or twice
A difficult route
But worth the price
 
Took weeks and weeks
To win her over
Through valleys and peaks
She was a rover
 
A single mother
She has medical challenges
No men and does not want another
Just wants to keep her life in balance
 
I was not deterred
I was smitten
I was stirred
I needed to fit in
 
I met her needs
Little acts of kindness
Many small deeds
Growing our fondness
 
We talked and talked
We played and played
We shared and shared
We gave and gave
 
Life took off
We lived mightily
Enjoying life from a trough
We were a family
 
We ate dinner together
We walked the dog
We attended school events
We went on trips
 
She improved my condition
Reducing my stress
Eliminating my strange emission
Making my symptoms much less
 
Our lives proceeded
For a long period of time
Warning signs were unheeded
We had reached our prime
 
She had to choose
Old life or new
Two different views
Which one is true
 
I did not help
Wanting my way
All ended in a yelp
And a fray
 
I was frustrated
She was smothered
All issues debated
She was mothered
 
She was safe
She was secure
She was loved
She was dandy
 
No reason to change
No reason to move
No reason to exchange
No reason to improve
 
Our lives deteriorated
Too hard to maintain
I was patient and waited
Living through the strain
 
Talk and talk
Going to transform
Waiting out the clock
And get through the storm
 
I needed her
She nurtured me
I wanted her
She understood me
 
But it was not to be
Our love did not last
We lost our glee
Our lives were in the past
 
No new memories
No new adventures
No new experiences
No new experiments
 
My heart was broken
I was incredibly sad
She had spoken
Again a nomad
 
On my own
Living life
Life alone
No community strife
 
Just circumstances
Circumstances of anxiousness
Circumstances of nervousness
Circumstances of restiveness
 
This went on for a while
A routine of existence
Peaceful in exile
Not much resistance
 
The text came
For us to unite
Back in the game
Everything alright
 
We had not changed
Back to our truths
Nothing rearranged
Back to our youths
 
Playing ball
Going to pool
Watching movies
Holding hands
 
We had missed some days
We had not seen each other
We had made it through the haze
We had ended the pother
 
Smart Girl found a disorder
Sounding like my quirks
Almost like a hoarder
Of crazy weird works
 
I was diagnosed with it
How exciting and fresh
But it fit
I keep my pound of flesh
 
No death sentence
How grand
Learn tools of repentance
Tools to manage my land
 
Land of coziness
Land of familiarity
Land of closeness
Land of comradeliness
 
Journey back to the word
Adore worship admire
Love esteem honor preferred
My heart on fire
 
Unexpectantly
Our lives interrupted
Our future and destiny
Everything disrupted
 
Disrupted our utopia
Where do we go
Entering dystopia
We will not grow
 
Back to the same place
A prison of sorts
Not our own space
Our life distorts
 
Too many chiefs
Too many frustrations
Too many rules
Too many debates
 
We are a couple
It is up to us
Not very supple
Just more fuss
 
Hard enough with one
But two or three
Along with intentional shun
We will not be free
 
I want to respect
I want to admire
I want to cherish
I want to honor
 
I want to get along
I want to go with the flow
I want to be strong
I want to be in the show
 
But it has to be her and me
Our lives and decisions
We must unify and agree
To enjoy our visions
 
I gave up hope
Thinking it was done
Walking the tightrope
No life in the long run
 
She had made her choice
Months ago
I heard her voice
I was useless cargo
 
I was expendable
I was a throwaway
I was undefendable
I was a cliche
 
Moody
Crazy
Unstable
Wacky
 
Yes it is correct
I am not perfect
Last time I checked
But then she picked
 
She picked love
She picked romance
She picked affection
She picked one to kiss
 
She likes our playfulness
She likes our secureness
She likes our tenderness
She likes our togetherness
 
Adore is here
In all its glory
Shout and hear
Our great story
 
We have fun
And laugh
We have joy
And happiness
 
Adore is a journey
A road to travel
A grand tourney
Let us not unravel