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The Drug

The Drug
 
Amitriptyline
Is my drug
Not really crystalline
I think like a slug
 
So very very dragging
So very very hampered
So very very lagging
So very very hammered
 
I can not think
I can not write
I can not read
I can not understand
 
I can walk
I can talk
I can exercise
I can drive
 
A trade off
Lose the crazy woes
Do not unbelieve or scoff
Or live in the shadows
 
Easier to be alone
Easier to hideaway
Easier to be my own
Easier to live that way
 
Live in solitary
Or to fight the darkness
I am my adversary
What a starkness
 
To live in society
Amitriptyline is required
To end anxiety
A new life is desired
 
Slow with limited derailments
Sleep too much
Drugged but no aliments
Amitriptyline is a crutch
 
Last time 10 mg
Then 20 and 30 mg
Then 40 to 70 mg
All the way to 80 mg
 
In the end
It began shirking
No more dividends
And it quit working
 
Better for awhile
To have some assistance
A pleasant smile
And a healthy existence

Adore

Adore
 
What is adore
How do we get there
Not a story of lore
But let me share
 
Starts as a nightingale
A crush on a caregiver
A common tale
To someone who can deliver
 
Smart Girl worked hard
To analyze me
Another patient on her dance card
She is my significant key
 
She found I walk funny
She sent me to a specialist
She was so sunny
She was excellent
 
I found her smart
I found her pretty
I found her a piece of art
I found her witty
 
Yes they fixed my pain
My leg quit hurting
Adverting the ball and chain
Now my interest was flirting
 
I asked her out
Once or twice
A difficult route
But worth the price
 
Took weeks and weeks
To win her over
Through valleys and peaks
She was a rover
 
A single mother
She has medical challenges
No men and does not want another
Just wants to keep her life in balance
 
I was not deterred
I was smitten
I was stirred
I needed to fit in
 
I met her needs
Little acts of kindness
Many small deeds
Growing our fondness
 
We talked and talked
We played and played
We shared and shared
We gave and gave
 
Life took off
We lived mightily
Enjoying life from a trough
We were a family
 
We ate dinner together
We walked the dog
We attended school events
We went on trips
 
She improved my condition
Reducing my stress
Eliminating my strange emission
Making my symptoms much less
 
Our lives proceeded
For a long period of time
Warning signs were unheeded
We had reached our prime
 
She had to choose
Old life or new
Two different views
Which one is true
 
I did not help
Wanting my way
All ended in a yelp
And a fray
 
I was frustrated
She was smothered
All issues debated
She was mothered
 
She was safe
She was secure
She was loved
She was dandy
 
No reason to change
No reason to move
No reason to exchange
No reason to improve
 
Our lives deteriorated
Too hard to maintain
I was patient and waited
Living through the strain
 
Talk and talk
Going to transform
Waiting out the clock
And get through the storm
 
I needed her
She nurtured me
I wanted her
She understood me
 
But it was not to be
Our love did not last
We lost our glee
Our lives were in the past
 
No new memories
No new adventures
No new experiences
No new experiments
 
My heart was broken
I was incredibly sad
She had spoken
Again a nomad
 
On my own
Living life
Life alone
No community strife
 
Just circumstances
Circumstances of anxiousness
Circumstances of nervousness
Circumstances of restiveness
 
This went on for a while
A routine of existence
Peaceful in exile
Not much resistance
 
The text came
For us to unite
Back in the game
Everything alright
 
We had not changed
Back to our truths
Nothing rearranged
Back to our youths
 
Playing ball
Going to pool
Watching movies
Holding hands
 
We had missed some days
We had not seen each other
We had made it through the haze
We had ended the pother
 
Smart Girl found a disorder
Sounding like my quirks
Almost like a hoarder
Of crazy weird works
 
I was diagnosed with it
How exciting and fresh
But it fit
I keep my pound of flesh
 
No death sentence
How grand
Learn tools of repentance
Tools to manage my land
 
Land of coziness
Land of familiarity
Land of closeness
Land of comradeliness
 
Journey back to the word
Adore worship admire
Love esteem honor preferred
My heart on fire
 
Unexpectantly
Our lives interrupted
Our future and destiny
Everything disrupted
 
Disrupted our utopia
Where do we go
Entering dystopia
We will not grow
 
Back to the same place
A prison of sorts
Not our own space
Our life distorts
 
Too many chiefs
Too many frustrations
Too many rules
Too many debates
 
We are a couple
It is up to us
Not very supple
Just more fuss
 
Hard enough with one
But two or three
Along with intentional shun
We will not be free
 
I want to respect
I want to admire
I want to cherish
I want to honor
 
I want to get along
I want to go with the flow
I want to be strong
I want to be in the show
 
But it has to be her and me
Our lives and decisions
We must unify and agree
To enjoy our visions
 
I gave up hope
Thinking it was done
Walking the tightrope
No life in the long run
 
She had made her choice
Months ago
I heard her voice
I was useless cargo
 
I was expendable
I was a throwaway
I was undefendable
I was a cliche
 
Moody
Crazy
Unstable
Wacky
 
Yes it is correct
I am not perfect
Last time I checked
But then she picked
 
She picked love
She picked romance
She picked affection
She picked one to kiss
 
She likes our playfulness
She likes our secureness
She likes our tenderness
She likes our togetherness
 
Adore is here
In all its glory
Shout and hear
Our great story
 
We have fun
And laugh
We have joy
And happiness
 
Adore is a journey
A road to travel
A grand tourney
Let us not unravel

Checklist

Checklist
 
I have had one forever
Once it is on the list
A grand endeavor
Not to be missed
 
Get it done
Can be transposable
Not always fun
Quick as possible
 
Which one first
Which one second
Which one makes a difference
Which one is important
 
From A1 to C1
A ranking tactic
Works in the long run
Way too didactic
 
How did I get consumed
By this need to check it off
Too much to do I assumed
Me and my mighty trough
 
A trough of obsession
A trough of greed
A trough of pride
A trough of ambition
 
But where am I now
Chasing a disorder
Nothing but a sow
Who is out of order
 
I must throw the list away
Does not matter to me
Who cares if I stray
And become carefree
 
I have been told
Does it matter
In the past it was gold
Today dung splatter
 
I have changed
To get relief
Not to be deranged
But to reduce my grief
 
Go away systematic rules
To accomplish tasks
These are just tools
Anxiety and depression masks
 
Masks of fatigue
Masks of rages
Masks of technique
Masks of past ages
 
Take mine down
Get rid of it
I want to stay around
And keep my wit

People in Your Life

People in Your Life
 
People come and go
Part of our life
And it is so
Some through strife
 
Harder for some
To keep it together
Always so dumb
Bad or fair weather
 
Prideful
Arrogant
Selfish
Belligerent
 
To name a few
But more to ask for
If you care to view
Here are more
 
Life circumstances
Life traumas
Life illnesses
Life mysteries
 
All kinds of reasons
To be a jerk
In all seasons
To go berserk
 
How you act
Is how you are framed
Try to use tact
Or you get blamed
 
You cannot hide
For exceptionally long
Sooner or later you slide
You are not that strong
 
To keep it at bay
To keep it hidden
To keep it suppressed
To keep it smothered
 
Useless effort
Try to isolate
To be better
Is one trait
 
Force others away
So be by yourself
No one to play
Just pictures on the shelf
 
A lonely crutch
To protect your outbursts
People are too much
These are not unique firsts
 
Social distancing
Endless therapy
Countless medicines
Retreats and asylums
 
Doctors galore
Psychobabble
What a bore
Good for the rabble
 
But the worse cases
Must be dumbed down
See it in their faces
The emotionless frowns
 
Pump them with drugs
To make them acceptable
No longer thugs
Almost respectable
 
They might be slow
They might drool
They might be lazy
They might be dim
 
But they are tamed
They can be presented
And beautifully framed
Sat in the corner ornamented
 
I do not want to be dampened
I do not want to be unnoticed
I do not want to be a simpleton
I do not want to be devalued
 
But to live in peace
To live with immunity
To live it must cease
To live in unity
 
Cease the anger
Cease the explosion
Cease the banter
Cease the implosion
 
Make a choice
Or stay in a cave
And listen to your own voice
And be your own slave

Persecution

As I celebrate this Independence Day, I realize that the original colonies felt persecuted. Today, persecution exists in many manners and forms. No one has an exclusive right to claim persecution because it happens all over the world depending on who has the power. As Christians and United States citizens we have greater responsibility and accountability to address the injustices of our world. Happy Fourth of July! Remember how we got here and why!

Persecution

Persecution is hostility
Persecution is ill treatment
Persecution is unfair treatment
Persecution is abusive treatment
 
Any act of ill will
Can be persecution
Sometimes a bitter pill
No real solution
 
Majority or minority
Whatever color
No authority or absolute authority
Few dollars or bunch of dollars
 
Atheism or Christian
Does not matter
This is not fiction
Never ending chapter
 
People will hate
People will control
People will attack
People will kill
 
This is our story
Story of humanity
Journey of fury
And depravity
 
Christians are oppressed
In many ways
This is not a test
For it happens nowadays
 
Christians are called names
Christians are beaten
Christians are rejected
Christians are murdered
 
I live in the USA
Things are not like that here
Maybe not today
But listen and rehear
 
Bad News
2 Timothy 3:12  (ESV) 12 Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted,
1 John 3:13  (ESV) 13 Do not be surprised, brothers,[a] that the world hates you.
 
Good News
1 Peter 3:14  (ESV) 14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled,
Matthew 5:10 (ESV) 10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
 
But not in my United States
Not in my USA city
Not with my friends and mates
Not in my church committee
 
We are called by Christ
To be one body
Not cut and sliced
And not inferior or shoddy
 
One body as a whole
Caring for one another
Where I take a stroll
Or miles from my sister and brother
 
A Christian persecuted in Louisiana
A Christian persecuted in St Louis
A Christian persecuted in Facebook
A Christian persecuted in the World
 
All the same to our Lord
And it should be the same to us
We are on the same game board
Some castled in blissful snugness
 
Snugness from the action
Snugness from the abuses
Snugness from murderous fractions
Snugness from the bruises
 
The Bible is clear
We are part of the One
So shed a heartfelt tear
For our Savior the Son
 
Do not end now
Do not forget
Do not isolate
Do not think your set
 
Jesus wants us to love
He wants us to get along
Not be under the thumb of
Those strong and wrong
 
Many are harmed
Not just us Christian Saints
Remember the abused
And their complaints
 
Black lives of import
And they have a point
Not useless chatter
An ugly wart
 
Muslims matter too
China restricts their birth pace
This is more than a few
Millions lost without a trace
 
Women are left behind
Why does their paycheck lag
And the world is blind
Do you have to nag
 
Nagged to get your issues addressed
Nagged to listen and learn
Nagged to help and invest
Nagged to make it your turn
 
It is our turn to be accountable
To use our capabilities
To be countable
 
To end these hostilities
 
Christians have a call
To address conflicts
No matter how small
And no quick fix
 
God wants us to help
God wants us to intervene
God wants us to have compassion
God wants us to act
 
Act in many ways
Donate your time
Donate your money
Donate your prayers
 
God wants you to know
God loves everyone
Christians must acknowledge
We are under the same sun
 
Scriptures for One Body
Romans 12:4 (ESV) 4 For as in one body we have many members,[a] and the members do not all have the same function,
 
1 Corinthians 10:17(ESV) 17 Because there is one bread, we who are many are one body, for we all partake of the one bread.
 
1 Corinthians 12:12  (ESV) One Body with Many Members 12 For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ.
1 Corinthians 12:13 (ESV) 13 For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves[a] or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.
1 Corinthians 12:14 (ESV) 14 For the body does not consist of one member but of many.
Ephesians 2:16  (ESV) 16 and might reconcile us both to God in one body through the cross, thereby killing the hostility.