Torment

 I do not know
 Does it really matter
 The ongoing show
 Life and dreams in tatter
  
 My brain goes dead
 My eyes are hurt by sunlight
 My sudden falls I dread
 My words are not right
  
 A rare disease
 A common anxiety
 Just please please
 Not so much variety
  
 Give me a concern
 Give me a fight
 Give me a turn
 Give me the right
  
 Right to control
 Right to fix
 Right to be whole
 Right to end the conflicts
  
 Conflicts of doubt
 Conflicts of pain
 Conflicts to act out
 Conflicts of strain
  
 I am tired
 What is worse
 A life expired
 Or alone in the universe
  
 I am not afraid to die
 Jesus is there
 It is not a lie
 In the Lord’s care
  
 I afraid to be alone
 It is stressful
 A great unknown
 Very distressful
  
 Why why why
 Can I not be content
 I want to cry
 A great torment
  
  
 Tormented by what
 No human touch
 Not clear cut
 Or just too much
  
 Do I smother
 Do I overwhelm
 One after another
 Making it my realm
  
 Drive people away
 Make them afraid
 To share and play
 My torments are homemade
  
 I cannot understand
 A balanced life together
 I demand and demand
 All to be hooked by a tether
  
 Can I change
 Find a way
 To rearrange
 My greatest dismay
  
 Confined in solitary
 I have friends
 We can be merry
 But that where it ends
  
 No one to dance
 No companionship
 No romance
 No courtship
  
 I have tried
 I have bailed
 I have cried
 I have failed
  
 It is my fate
 To go one more time
 Is it too late
 To make my life rhyme
  
 Be told
 Be courageous
 Be bold
 It is advantageous