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Beginning to Sail

I learned to sail
On a little lake
Bring on the gale
A piece of cake

We flipped
And turned
We whipped
And learned

How to sail close reach
How to right our boat
How to run up on the beach
How to sit and float

Not terribly hard
But full of fun
In our backyard
And in the sun

Friends would ride
Along with my dog
Jumping from side to side
Just like a frog

Intentionally capsizing
And driving me mad
There was no compromising
They were annoying and bad

I wanted to cruise
They wanted to tip
I would always lose
But it was my ship

A little Laser
Chasing about
A hell raiser
Fun no doubt

We were young
And it was thrilling
I was stung
Sailing was fulfilling

I was mesmerized and hooked
The rest of my life and forever more
A skill many have overlooked
I always miss when ashore

The sheets full of the wind
The boat rocking up and down
Throughout history of mankind
Sailors of old necessary playground

To travel and trade
They would navigate
And they were not afraid
It was their fate

We are tourist
On our vessels
Not real purist
We hide in nestles

Where it is secure
Until the bad weather passes
We are not on a timetable tour
Creeping about like molasses

Enjoying the swim
Fishing and eating
Everything a whim
Not competing

Enjoying life
Sailing about
No mayhem or strife
Sailing the best route

Praise on my lips
Salute to sailors of old
And their necessary trips
They were brave and bold

End of Game

football players
Photo by Joe Calomeni on Pexels.com
  I have been there
 Struggling to win
 Throwing up a prayer
 Taking it on the chin
  
 A strong punch
 I worked so hard
 And I feel the crunch
 My soul and body marred
  
 As in the game
 So many opportunities
 To win with fame
 For our communities
  
 But it is not finished
 You may feel it is
 Do not be diminished
 Or end with a fizz
  
 Take stock in your abilities
 And know you are strong
 Reduce your liabilities
 And sing a happy song
  
 There is more time to comeback
 Life has not ended
 Pushback and attack
 Everything will be splendid
  
 Remember your durability
 And your unique traits
 Hopefulness  is not unnecessary futility
 But a date with our fates
  
 Decide to fight
 For your hereafter
 The day is bright
 Sunny with laughter
  
 React to your circumstances
 Enjoy the hear and now
 Take your chances
 Stay behind the plow
  
 Make your rows straight
 A strenuous chore
 No time to wait
 You can score 

All About Today

   
 I am not sure or know
 If I will waste away and die
 Every day go with the flow
 Daily just soar and fly
  
 Fly like a bird
 Enjoy the ride
 Move ever forward
 Take life in stride
  
 Stride day by day
 One day at a time
 Merriment and play
 A life that will rhyme
  
 Rhyme requires two
 Words that go together
 Why can it not be you
 To get me through bad weather
  
 I know I know another place
 And another time it is not right
 But I want to see your face
 Side by side through this fight
  
 A companion buddy sidekick
 Who enjoys the journey
 And we are familiar and klick
 Through many tourneys
  
 We are familiar
 We are comfortable
 We are known
 We are snug
  
 Yes it can be hard
 I can be frustrated
 Leaving you scarred
 With words I have stated
  
 But you are not perfect
 Ignoring and hurting me
 Increasing the conflict
 But let us agree to disagree
  
  
 All the naming and blaming
 Is a waste of energy and strength
 I am proclaiming and exclaiming
 I will go through any length
  
 To apologize and to repent
 I am so so sad
 Because it is not my hearts intent
 To be so mean and bad
  
 You may not trust me
 And want me back
 It is your choice to be free
 If there was a tiny crack
  
 Where we could amend
 Our life dreams
 My best friend
 I wish it is our theme
  
 A theme of love
 A theme of us
 A theme of care
 A theme of respect
  
 All of the good things
 Life demands
 As we soar on our wings
 Over the badlands
  
 We fly in unity
 Twisting and turning
 Searching for opportunities
 For our lifes yearnings
  
 Soaring higher and higher
 Flying unrestricted and liberated
 I hear the angels choir
 Beautiful and orchestrated
  
 Enjoy the glorious songs
 On journeys we navigate
 Easing and erasing our wrongs
 From our first to our last date 

Happy Birthday Again



Birthday Again
 
I have another birthday
One more year
Let us downplay
And save the cheer
 
I have had many good ones
I plan to have many more
I have eaten cake in tons
I have blown out candles galore
 
What is one more celebration
We all celebrate them
Like the stars in the constellation
Routine and another ho hum
 
But what if I say
I am kidding
I want the display
I am admitting
 
Display the cake
Display the cards
Display the presents
Display the smiles
 
Five or Fifty
I want the recognition
Really cool and nifty
Bring on the magician and musician
 
I am happy everyone remembered
This special ceremonial occasion
Another numbered and rendered
Extending my life equation
 
I am delighted my loves are here
Kissing and hugging me
And I want to hear
Happy Birthday sung with glee

Tools to Help me Live

I have struggled for years, and I have searched for tools to help me live better. I want tools to help me learn what triggers my symptoms and how to reset the triggers as quickly as possible.

I have had ongoing issues for years, and no physical defects can be found beyond repaired damage to knee and hips along with blood clots. I have fallen backward; my neck hurts, my head hurts, my eyes get stressed, my head goes blank, my body wobbles, and many other little nuisances. No one has given me solutions to these issues except to drug me up and to make me into a zombie. I don’t particularly appreciate living this way. If anything, this lifestyle drives anxiety and depression, which activates, compounds, and exaggerated my issues.

The diagnosis of Functional Neurological Disorder (FND) opens new avenues to explore, including Cognitive behavior Theory and Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). I am exploring these two tools, and I am seeking counselors to help me learn these tools and to apply them to my life.

Cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) is based on several core principles, including:

1. Psychological problems are based, in part, on faulty or unhelpful ways of thinking.

2. Psychological problems are based, in part, on learned patterns of unhelpful behavior.

3. People suffering from psychological problems can learn better ways of coping with them, thereby relieving their symptoms and becoming more effective in their lives.

https://www.apa.org/ptsd-guideline/patients-and-families/cognitive-behavioral#

Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is a type of cognitive-behavioral therapy. Its main goals are to teach people how to live in the moment, develop healthy ways to cope with stress, regulate their emotions, and improve their relationships with others.

https://www.verywellmind.com/dialectical-behavior-therapy-1067402#citation-1

The Linehan Institute Behavioral Tech. What Is Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)? 2017.

I plan to write more about my journey, trying to understand these tools and how they are working to make my life better. I will add posts about other tools that I use to help, including breathing exercises, writing, exercising, and yoga—also, a post here and there about God and his provision for me. These tools and exercises do not compete with God. To me, they are the fruit of God’s existence.

I hope they may help you if you have sprouts of anxiety or depression.

Have any of you had any experiences with CBT or DBT? Did it help?